Listening to others with understanding & Empathy
Empathy is a vital skill that must be taught, modeled, and practiced to become a part of a person's lived experience. Teaching students not only about empathy, but also how to listen with understanding and empathy is a crucial component to fostering social-emotional growth in my classroom. This Habit of Mind will continue to serve my students beyond the walls of my classroom in their academic and personal lives (Mindful by Design, 2012). Learning to empathetically listen to others will help them think about the human experience in a more thoughtful and intentional way.
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I explicitly taught listening to others with understanding and empathy at the beginning of the year. Students listened to “The Rabbit Listened” by Cori Doerrfeld to understand the central message of the book, listening with empathy. The book follows a child named Taylor as his friends try to help him through a challenging time. Rather than trying to fix Taylor’s problem, the Rabbit sat and listened. This book showed different ways people try to help and exemplified why listening is the most important first step to truly be empathetic (Heick, 2012). This read aloud served as the opening to explicitly teach this Habit of Mind.
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I watched as my students made connections between Taylor’s emotional experience and their own lives during a turn and talk. My students independently recognized that listening was what helped Taylor feel better. Students were able to identify specific moments when friends listened to them and made them feel loved and supported. One student shared that when she had spilled on herself in class, she felt embarrassed and sad. She knew the spill would dry but she was still upset. She went to her friend to share how she was feeling. Instead of doing something, her friend listened and showed her that she was loved. She said this helped her feel better because she did not feel alone. Hearing my student make this personal connection and specifically identify how she felt before and after her friend listened made it even more clear that my students crave the skills, language, and opportunity to explore their emotional experiences.
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We ended the lesson practicing whole body listening with a partner. We went through each of the eight ways we can whole body listen. We practiced keeping our hands still, turning our bodies to face a person, and focusing on how our heart was feeling while we listened. I gave my students one minute to ask their partner how they were feeling, and use our new strategies to listen with empathy and understanding. I saw one student had his hands on his chest during the activity. When I asked him why, he explained it helped him keep his hands still and helped him remember to listen with his heart and care about what his partner was saying. This activity showed students had mastered the lesson through their implementation of whole body listening strategies.
Explicit Instruction
The lesson plan shown here is how I introduce and explicitly taught listening with empathy and understanding to my students. It includes an engaging read aloud and personal examples to help students make a connection. The video here shows my students responding to the lesson and engaging with the material through turn and talks. These show students reference my guidance in character traits.
In order to reinforce listening with empathy throughout my classroom routines, I use the idea of listening with our whole body during academic time, as well as when mediating conflict between students. I include the whole body listening chart as a reference for students as they come to carpet. It reminds students to check in with themselves and make sure they are listening with empathy. I also include the slide before the read aloud portion of our morning. This part of the day comes right after a brain-break. The visual serves as a reminder for students to self-monitor.
Reinforcing whole body listening with empathy has also changed the way we discuss negative incidents in my classroom. I ask students if they were listening to the other person’s needs with their whole bodies. Even if the student who was hurt did not ask the person to stop with their words, if students listen with their whole body they might see that the person is making an upset face. They can also use the whole body listening to think about how they would feel in the situation, and consider if they would want to be treated in the same way as they were treating others.
Reinforcement - Whole Body Listening
The images shown here are an example of where I include the whole body listening poster throughout my lessons. When this comes on the board, I give my students 10 seconds to check in with their bodies to ensure they are ready to be empathetic listeners. Students will typically use this time to readjust their body, make sure they are facing the right direction, and making sure their hands are in their lap, safe and quiet.
The video here shows my class quickly reviewing what whole body listening looks and feels like before a read aloud. We use this strategy everyday, multiple times a day. Students have become very familiar with the process and the reasoning behind whole body listening. This video shows students are able to refer to my guidance on listening to others with understanding and empathy. In the video students share what it looks like to listen with their eyes and mouth, as well as why it is important.
I re-designed the color chart system in my class to include opportunities for students to practice and recognize empathy. Students are able to move their classmates from the green color up to purple when they see someone making a loving and helpful choice. This celebration of empathy encourages students as they are being recognized for listening and truly hearing their peer's needs.
Color Chart System
The file here show the color chart behavior system I redesigned for my classroom. Each color is framed in a way that considers student behavior in the context of its impact on our learning community. Students develop their empathy through this color chart system as they use it as a chance to reflect on how the choices they have made are impacting the learning of their classmates. Students are also able to clip their classmates up to purple if they notice them acting with empathy and understanding.
I start every morning with a feelings check-in. I ask students to put their hand on their heart, and think about how they are feeling in the moment. I display a variety of feeling words with visual aids to help students develop new language skills and develop fundamental skills needed for self-regulation. Starting the day in this way develops a stronger sense of community in my classroom, and develops a loving learning environment. When students are sharing, I model listening to others with understanding and empathy. My students are also practicing the skill as they listen to their classmates explain how they are feeling and why.
Reinforcement - Feelings Check-In
This video shows our daily morning feelings check in. Students share how they are feeling and why they are feeling that way. This gives students an opportunity to share what is going on in their heads and their hearts. It is also a time when students practice listening with understanding. Before we start the check in, I display the whole body listening chart and remind students to use their whole body to listen to what their classmates are sharing with them.
At the end of everyday, we spend time to share shout-outs. Students have the opportunity to give a shout-out to someone who was kind or helpful in someway. This is an opportunity not only for students to practice listening to others with understanding and empathy, but also celebrate how others have shown them that they are listening with understanding and empathy.
Celebrations
The clip here shows a student starting their shout out. The rest of the class echos back "shout-out" to make sure everyone is paying attention and ready to listen with understanding and empathy. Once a the class has said "shout-out," the student shares the name of the student they are celebrating and the specific reason that person deserves a celebration. I have seen students express joy at recieving a shout out. One student shared that when she receives a shout-out she knows she is being a good friend at school. This shows students are interanlizing the lesson on character traits and they have led to personal growth.
The transcript here shows two student shout-outs that were given at the end of the day. The first student is celebrating her friend for understanding consent and listening to her need for space. The second student is shouting out a student for recognizing that she was feeling sad because they listened with their heart. This shows students referenced my teacher's guidance on character traits.
References
Mindful by Design. (2009, January 9). Art Costa describes the Habits of Mind. [Video file]. Retrieved from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OT0vXFP_RYI
Heick, T. (2012, October 19). Integrating the 16 Habits of Mind [web log comment]. Retrieved from https://www.edutopia.org/blog/habits-of-mind-terrell-heick